Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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