Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
