God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
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The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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