Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
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Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
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And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize