We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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