just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize