You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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