escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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