is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Randomize
