Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
