I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Randomize
