But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
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he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
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She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
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