So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!