i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
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