you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
