I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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