just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
it glows. i had to have it.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize
