You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.