about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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