Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
