if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
