I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Randomize
