quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
