your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
