Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
God I need to hump something, right now.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
