Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Randomize
