One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Randomize