This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
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