Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Randomize
