Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
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