Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
You can't motorboat a personality
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
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