Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
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