He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize