Swine flu. Run for my life!
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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