thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Randomize