do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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