I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
