yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
