We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
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