So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Randomize
