i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
Randomize
