so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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