I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Randomize
