I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Randomize
