What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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