I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
So gin and wine won't be happening again
I intend to get homeless drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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