I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
