I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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