great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Randomize