At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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