i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
Randomize